On Courage

Demonstrating courage and a tolerance for risk is critical in all aspects of our lives. Given the pace and complexity of our world, we need the courage to make decisions with limited information, the courage to envision possibilities, and the courage to honor our values and culture while embracing change and new ideas. To quote Anais Nin: “Our lives expand or recede based on our ability to be courageous” (via Cindy Solomon, Creating Courage).

One of the statistics Cindy cited was particularly compelling: 86% of people surveyed who were 65 or older or terminally ill indicated that they wished they had shown greater courage in their life.

I’ve been wrestling with the concept of courage for a few weeks. My friend Jenny’s mother died of cancer recently. Jen was with her mother when she died. The edited version is that her mother fought to the end. This was a woman who was 5’7” and weighed less than 75 pounds. She was physically incapacitated, her quality of life was virtually nil, and yet she kept fighting.

The question I would pose is what are you willing to fight for? All of us are in a far better position to achieve our objectives than Jen's mother was, and yet we sometimes simply abandon our dreams without a whimper, much less a battle. What haunted me about this situation is that there were a couple of goals on my 2007 list that I had summarily decided were unrealistic. I have since reversed that decision.

A follow-up question: are you fighting for what’s important to you? In the February issue of the Harvard Business Review, there’s a case study that involves a female executive who is struggling with classic parent/promotion issues. Although she’s effective in her current role, she exhibits a disturbing lack of initiative in reconciling her conflicting priorities. One of the commentators lays it on the line: “she isn’t displaying the most important qualities needed in a senior manager: decisiveness, a knack for proactively identifying and solving problems, an ability to prioritize, and courage.”

Courage is not inherited. It is not something that is awarded or bestowed. It is, to quote Ruth Gordon, “like a muscle…strengthened by use.”

Art credit: Julie Paschkis, Courage. Limited edition prints available at www.artforallofus.com. Paintings are available at Grover Thurston Gallery. Books are available at www.allforkidsbooks.com or amazon.com.